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If you’re a single woman over 40, follow the blog to learn how to attract quality men, sustain a healthy relationship, break up with dignity, understand and communicate with men 40 +, and much more…

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Does 50 Shades of Grey Glorify Abusive Relationships?

Posted by on February 25, 2015 in communication skills in dating, dating a dangerous man, dating after divorce, dating in midlife, single women over 40 | 0 comments

50 shades of greyHave you seen the movie, 50 Shades of Grey? I confess that I read all three books and went to see the movie with my boyfriend on Valentine’s Day weekend. Not because I loved the books – they were poorly written (enough with Ana’s inner goddess and her deep sighing). Not because I thought the movie would be an Oscar contender – it’s definitely not (even though Ana’s lip biting deserves an honorable mention). But as a dating coach, I was curious about why the books and movie generated so much interest. The characters are not believable, the story line is weak, and there are many things that are disturbing about 50 Shades. Does it glorify abusive relationships? In some ways, but it’s not black and white. Does it give the wrong messages about love? Yes. But one thing I feel the movie/books did do well is normalize having open conversations about sex. (more…)

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Do You Bolt When the Honeymoon Phase is Over?

Posted by on February 20, 2015 in dating a dangerous man, dating after divorce, dating in midlife, red flags in relationships | 0 comments

honeymoon phaseHello. I’m Sandy Weiner, and I’m a recovering romantic adrenaline junky. Allow me to explain. My pre-marriage dating history was checkered with short smokin’ hot relationships. They usually lasted up to 3 months. I was addicted to the high of early romance. I loved the chemical rush of those first months, the “honeymoon phase”. When the high was over and reality reared its ugly head, the flaws of the relationship emerged. And bam, the relationship would be over in a flash. (more…)

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How to Transform Your Love Life

Posted by on February 19, 2015 in dating after divorce, dating in midlife, love after 40, self-esteem in dating | 0 comments

transform your love lifeMy radio guest, Kimberley Heart, has been a counselor and relationship expert for over 30 years. In her private practice, she has transformed relationships from a dying love to a metamorphosis experience. Her retreats for single women focus on their desires instead of the wants of society. As a post-trauma expert, with degrees in sociology, psychology and psychiatry, Kimberley also founded a revolutionary method of responding to the psychological needs of thousands after a major disaster. She has hosted her own talk shows and is recognized as the “go-to” expert for major networks for counsel on navigating emotional distress. I thoroughly enjoyed speaking with her on Last First Date Radio. Following are loosely transcribed highlights of our show about how to transform your love life. (more…)

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Fresh Date Ideas to Spark a New & Lasting Relationship

Posted by on February 12, 2015 in dating after divorce, first date success, love after 40 | 0 comments

date ideasWhen you’re out there in the dating world, you may feel like every other day you have the same plans with a different person. Dinner dates, grabbing a drink or even seeing a movie are basic first dates that can sometimes seem more like an interview than a fun time to get to know someone new. (more…)

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Codependency Recovery: How to Stop Loving the People Who Hurt You

Posted by on February 11, 2015 in dating a dangerous man, dating a narcissist, red flags in relationships, self-esteem in dating | 0 comments

codependencyPsychotherapist and author Ross A. Rosenberg, is the owner and works in Clinical Care Consultants, a counseling center in the northern suburbs of Chicago. He also owns and trains with Advanced Clinical Trainers (ACT), which provides a platform for talented and inspiring trainers, leaders and experts. Ross has been a psychotherapist since 1988. He is considered an expert in codependency recovery, sex and love addiction, and Narcissistic and Borderline Personality Disorders. Ross is a licensed therapist who is also a certified addiction counselor (CADC) and certified sex addictions therapist (CSAT). He joined me on Last First Date radio for a highly informative show about how to avoid dating and falling in love with the people who hurt us. Following are loosely transcribed highlights of the show. (more…)

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It’s Never Too Late To Find Love

Posted by on February 5, 2015 in dating after divorce, dating in midlife, love after 40 | 0 comments

never too late to find loveI admit it – I’m a sucker for a real life love story. No, I’m not talking about the Hollywood/Disney “some day your prince will come” type of love story. I’m referring to what happens in real life when two grownup people fall in love. These types of true love stories can be so uplifting. They can restore hope to those who have given up on love. Because it’s never too late to find love. And for those already in happy loving relationships, isn’t it great to know you’re in good company? (more…)

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4 Common Valentine’s Day Don’ts & How to Avoid Making Them

Posted by on February 2, 2015 in dating after divorce, dating in midlife, love after 40 | 0 comments

Valentine's DayWhether you adore Valentine’s Day or would be just as happy skipping ahead to February 15th, chances are good you’ll be acknowledging the day in some way if you have a significant other in your life. To ensure the best day possible with your sweetie, consider these common Valentine’s Day don’ts and how to avoid them. And if you’re single, there’s something at the end of the article for you, too.

Don’t: Over/Under-Do It

To avoid putting too much/not enough emphasis on the day, take an honest look at your sweetheart and his or her personality. You might be tempted to order a singing telegram for your honey at work followed up by an expensive dinner at a fancy schmantzy restaurant, but if your S/O is an introvert who prefers takeout and a cuddle on the couch, your well-meaning but over-the-top gestures will fall flat. However, if your sweetheart loves Valentine’s Day and has already mentioned how much he or she is looking forward to doing something special with you, you may want to step it up a notch. Think about what will make your partner happy, and you’ll be well on your way to having a memorable day together. (more…)

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Why Did I Become a Dating Coach?

Posted by on January 30, 2015 in communication skills in dating, dating after divorce, dating in midlife, love after 40 | 0 comments

Dating coachEver wonder what made me want to become a dating coach? It all started when I was getting married in my late twenties. As a child of divorce raised in a dysfunctional home, I set out to do better. I didn’t trust my heart to choose my husband (it had steered me wrong so many times). So, at age 28, when I thought I was past my prime (what was I thinking?), I picked my future husband by using a mental checklist. He’s crazy about me? Check! He’s good with his niece and nephew? Check! He’s honest and kind? Check! I believed I could somehow divorce-proof my marriage if my heart wasn’t doing the picking. After we got married, things began to fall apart almost immediately. (more…)

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Kirstie Alley is Ready to Date After Weight Loss

Posted by on January 26, 2015 in dating after divorce, dating in midlife, self-esteem in dating, single women over 40 | 0 comments

date after weight lossAnyone who’s followed Kirstie Alley over the past few decades has seen her gain and lose weight many times. We’re talking hundreds of pounds. Over and over again.  And each time she goes up or down on the scale, it’s all over the news. I just read an article about her most recent weight loss in closerweekly.com and feel compelled to weigh in (pun intended). Why? Because it’s about how she’s ready to date after weight loss. I’m not here to judge Ms. Alley for gaining and losing 50 pounds. That’s her private struggle, and she already has enough paparazzi who measure every step she takes and every morsel she eats. She certainly doesn’t need a dating coach to pass judgment on her. That’s not the focus of this article. What compelled me to write is that she decided to date again after losing 50 pounds. That’s a topic I know many readers can relate to.  (more…)

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Teaching Children of Divorce How to Make Healthier Choices in Relationships

Posted by on January 23, 2015 in dating after divorce, dating in midlife | 0 comments

children of divorceOne of the reasons many people stay married long after their marriages fail is fear. And one of the biggest fears is that divorce will destroy their kids. The problem is, staying in a bad marriage can have an equally – if not more severe – negative impact on your children. My divorce mediator once told me that children are like the doormen of your building – they hear and see everything! How true. No matter what we think we’re hiding from them, children feel the tension, contempt, and distance between you and your spouse. Divorce is often the best thing for children, especially if you and your ex can put your children’s needs first.  (more…)

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