A Marriage-Minded Guide for Lasting Love

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guide for lasting love

Want to find lasting love? In this episode of Last First Date Radio with Marcia Naomi Berger, you’ll get a guide for making love last.

Marcia Naomi Berger is the author of Marriage Minded: An A to Z Dating Guide for Lasting Love. She’s an internationally recognized relationship expert. She leads dynamic marriage and communication workshops and is a popular speaker at conferences. A clinical social worker with a private psychotherapy practice, she has taught continuing education classes for therapists at the University of California Berkeley Extension, Alliant International University, and for various professional associations. 

In this episode of Last First Date Radio:

  • The benefits of marriage
  • Obstacles to lasting love
  • Dating tips for those who want to get married
  • How to create your must-have list
  • How to create your deal breaker list
  • How to cultivate an interdependent relationship
  • How to keep marriage fun and long-lasting

EP 482: Marcia Naomi Berger – A Marriage-Minded Guide for Lasting Love

What are the benefits of marriage?

There are many benefits of being married as studies confirm, people in a satisfying marriage have better sleep, better mental and physical health, more sex, and an edge on longevity—and the often-unconscious reasons that exist for tying the knot. 

What are some obstacles to lasting love?

Ambivalence, anxiety, and a self-defeating attitude (I’m too fat, All the good men are married). Make it a priority to make peace with your own imperfections and develop an optimistic mindset.

Can you share some dating tips for those who want to get married?

Enjoy dating! Don’t ask if this is the one. Enjoy getting to know him. Appreciate and be yourself, set boundaries, identify the qualities you’re looking for in a spouse, and understand chemistry. Chemistry might not be felt initially but can develop later. And it can come and go. Look for shared values and lifestyle. 

How can you help our listeners create a must have list?

  • Make a list of the ten qualities you need in a partner. Separate what you want from what you need. 
  • Make a list of the ten qualities you bring to a relationship. 
  • Make a list of where you can grow on your journey to finding a partner.

How can you help our listeners define deal breakers?

It’s important to clearly define and communicate your deal breakers—something you genuinely need for your happiness in life, whether related to children, religion, lifestyle, career, or something else—before saying “I do.” If someone smokes, it might be a deal breaker, for others it might not be. The big deal breakers are character related; infidelity, abuse, and addictions.

What is interdependence, and how can people cultivate it in their relationship?

It’s crucial to start a marriage with confidence in yourself and know what you want and need in a relationship. A relationship requires interdependence, counting on each other to keep their word, and to be clear about what they want and need, and what their boundaries are. 

Cultivate healthy interdependence, balance time together and apart, and make space for each other to grow.

What are some ways to keep marriage interesting and fun?

In my first book, Marriage Meetings, I advocate for weekly meetings for your marriage to be successful. It’s a short gentle conversation, with positive communication skills. Express and receive gratitude, handle the business aspect of the marriage, plan vacations and self care times together. Deal with issues right away.

There are many ways to keep your marriage interesting, fun, and mutually fulfilling. It helps if you both have a sense of humor. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Enjoy just hanging out. Choose someone you’re comfortable hanging out with. 

Any final words for anyone who wants to go on their last first date?

Knowledge is power. Learn all you can know from experts and mentors. Know you deserve a good marriage and can develop an optimistic attitude to have it!

Watch the Marriage Minded Guide For Lasting Love on YouTube


Connect with Marcia: http://marcianaomiberger.com

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