Are You Trying to Force Your Relationship?

Posted by in breaking up with grace, communication skills in dating | 0 comments

force your relationship

If you’ve ever worked too hard to try and force your relationship, this video is for you. Learn how to STOP forcing a relationship!

Have you ever been in a relationship where you felt you were doing most of the work? Where you weren’t sure how he felt, because he wasn’t putting in the same effort?

In this video, I share 7 signs you’re trying to force a relationship, and what to do if you want to have a more equitable relationship.

7 Signs You’re Trying to Force a Relationship

  1. Trying to convince your partner to put more effort into the relationship.

2. Trying to get him to be more empathetic to your feelings and needs.

3. Continuing to pursue a relationship when he’s not emotionally available. 

4. Trying to persuade him to become exclusive when he’s not ready or willing.

5. Twisting yourself into a pretzel/losing yourself to keep him interested in you.

6. Trying to get him to work through conflict so you can resolve issues.

7. Making most of the effort in order not to lose him.

Why do we try to force relationships? 

1. We see potential in a person and we keep hoping he’ll rise up to that potential.

2. We ignore red flags because there’s attraction and connection.

3. We have poor role models for healthy relationships, so we’re unclear about what healthy looks like.

4. We are afraid of rejection or abandonment, so we work harder at keeping a relationship that’s not fulfilling.

5. We’re not clear about our basic human rights in relationships, such as ‘to love and be loved’.

5 Ways to Stop Forcing a Relationship

1. Choose a partner who is emotionally available.

2. Choose a partner who is kind and empathetic and cares about your feelings and needs.

3. Choose a partner who loves you for who you are, not who he needs you to be.

4. When there are issues, speak up and talk to your partner about what you need, and see if he is right for you.

5. Walk away from anyone who is the wrong fit for you.

When you stop trying to force the wrong relationship, you create space for the right man to come into your life.

Next month in the Woman of Value club, we’ll be focusing on communication skills in dating. Our monthly master class is with a special guest, Jocelyn Johnson, who will be guiding the group on how to check in with your date or partner on a regular basis to talk about the difficult stuff before they become issues.

Join us at


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