Gratitude Makes You a Better Dater

Posted by in dating in midlife, first date success, single women over 40 | 0 comments

gratitudeI’ve been hobbling around on one foot for a week and thinking a lot about gratitude. It all began last Sunday, after a first date with someone I met online. He took the train from Manhattan to meet me at a lovely restaurant near me. We sat for about two hours, dining al fresco on a gorgeous Summer afternoon. As I began walking towards my car, my left foot cramped up. I thought it was a fleeting thing and would work itself out by the time I got home. So, I made plans to take a walk with a friend, but my foot just kept getting worse. Our walk lasted about 10 minutes, as I limped around the block and collapsed on my coach. “What’s going on with my foot?” I thought. This is weird. I thought I’d sleep on it and all would be good in the morning.

The next day, my foot was so swollen and painful, I couldn’t put any pressure on it. I hopped around the house on my good foot, and called my internist to make an appointment. I was surprised to find out that I’m no longer on his plan – damned Obama care! I went to a walk-in urgent care center, and was diagnosed with tendinitis, probably from repeated pressure on my clutch pedal. I was prescribed the RICE method: rest, ice, compression, elevation. One week of rest – no walking or driving.

My aching foot made me so much more aware of how much I take my healthy body for granted. Have you ever noticed that even the slightest injury can bring your awareness to that area of your body? I’ve been thinking all week of how grateful I am to be able to walk.

The ALS ice bucket challenge (that’s gone viral – everyone is doing it!) has brought even more awareness to the importance of gratitude. I have a personal connection with ALS, a neighbor who has been declining rapidly over the years. He’s a brilliant man, and he can communicate that intelligence through his retina-controlled computer.

I’ve now made gratitude a daily practice. I begin my day with a meditation that brings my awareness to all that is good in my life. When you practice gratitude, you become more centered on others, and you focus less on what’s not working in your life. You become more capable of giving from a heart-centered place, and isn’t that what love is all about?

Do you have a gratitude practice? Please share what you’re grateful for today (and every day). Don’t wait for an injury to become conscious of all that is good in your life.



If you want to find love this year, there’s nothing like group coaching to keep you accountable and give you the dating tips and tools that really work for women over 40. The Last First Date Inner Circle features monthly topic-based Q & A calls about dating in midlife plus a private forum for women to connect and share their experiences. All calls are recorded and transcribed, and you get a free chapter a month from Sandy’s upcoming book. This month, the topic was where to find great men! I shared 11 creative tips on where to find the good guys at this age. Click HERE to join us! 




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