How Slow Dating Can Help You Avoid Heartbreak and Disappointment

Posted by in dating after divorce, dating in midlife, first date success | 0 comments

slow dating

What is slow dating? If you get attached to someone quickly, it’s a good idea to slow things down. In this video, you’ll learn how.

Slow dating is exactly what it sounds like: people taking time to get to know each other and build connection and trust before deciding if they want to pursue a relationship. Why has this trend emerged? It began with lockdowns and quarantines from the pandemic, where everyone had to slow down and get to know a potential date virtually. Many people have seen the benefits and are still slowing things down so they can have important conversations with matches before meeting. They are thinking more critically about what they want and need in a relationship. Slow dating can lead to deeper and more meaningful connections.

5 Benefits of Slow Dating

1. Develop a deeper understanding of each other’s values, beliefs, and compatibility.

2. More authentic connection, as you gradually build trust and emotional intimacy instead of jumping in with physical intimacy too soon.

3. Helps alleviate the pressure and expectations that often come with traditional dating, allowing people to enjoy the process of getting to know each other without the stress of rushing into commitment.

4. Encourages people to focus on quality over quantity when it comes to dating. By investing time and energy into slowly building a connection with one person at a time, people can avoid the temptation to constantly search for the next best thing and instead foster a more meaningful connection with a potential partner.

5. Leads to better communication, increased emotional investment, and a stronger bond, ultimately increasing the likelihood of a successful and fulfilling relationship in the long run.

Going on fewer dates and slowing things down can actually help you find love sooner. Limiting your dates or matches makes it easier to focus and look for green or red flags in a potential partner.

5 Ground Rules for Slow Dating on the Apps

  1. Focus on the written content of a potential match’s profile, rather than their profile picture.
  2. Limit the amount of time you spend on dating apps. I recommend spending up to 20-minutes a day on the apps and sending up to two messages a day until you have a few conversations going.
  3. Limit the number of matches you actually talk to on the apps as well as the number of dates you go on. For example, if you are having quality conversations with three matches, choose the ones you like most and make sure you’re asking the right questions before your first meeting: anything relating to a person’s family, likes and dislikes, religion, and philosophies about life are good options.
  4. Get to know your match by observing how actions and words align. 
  5. Remember that the beginning stages of dating are for discovering about a person, not deciding that they’re the ONE!

Of course slow dating also applies to meeting people in real life, so get out there and talk to strangers! Have you ever practiced slow dating? Let me know in the comments.

If you’re feeling stuck in dating and relationships and would like to finally find your match, sign up for a complimentary 45-minute love breakthrough session with Sandy

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Get a copy of Sandy’s books, Becoming a Woman of Value; How to Thrive in Life and Love and Choice Points in Dating; Empowering Women to Make Healthier Decisions in Love.


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