How to Become a Better Lover

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better lover

If you want to become a better lover, listen to Amy Baldwin and April Lampert!

Amy Baldwin is a sex and relationship coach, certified sex educator, and co-owner of a mother-daughter-owned online pleasure boutique called Pure Pleasure Shop. April Lampert has been educating people about sex toys and sexual pleasure since 2008 and is the chief sales and partnerships officer and co-owner of the award-winning sex toy company, Hot Octopuss.

In this episode of Last First Date Radio:

  • How to know what you want in the bedroom–and how to ask for it
  • How to find the right sex toys to take pleasure to new heights 
  • How to become a better lover
  • How to have hotter, steamier sex and keep the fire burning

EP 579: Amy Baldwin and April Lampert – How to Become a Better Lover

Why did you write the book, Shameless Sex?

We have a weekly podcast called Shameless Sex. The podcast became a business, and the concept for the book came to us and it took five years to write and publish. The book is relatable for all people over eighteen. It’s about choosing the outcome you desire. 

How can people figure out what they want in the bedroom, and how can they ask for it? 

Start with the not so sexy parts, which is getting clear about shame and trauma. How do they act as barriers to yourself and your partners. Then get clear about what type of healing you need. The next step is to heal and reprogram your system. Now you can learn the fun stuff for yourself and for your partners. 

An example of something sexy to ask for in the bedroom is to make it fun. Explore your yesses: Do you want to: Explore some fantasies? Explore a clitoral vibrator? New positions? What are your maybes? What are your nos? Make your lists and compare with a partner. Then, you can have an intimate date night with these menus. You probably want to have many of these conversations outside of the bedroom. Use the CONNECT method (listen to the podcast to learn what that is).

How can people find the right sex toys to take pleasure to new heights? 

We have a toy for men with erectile issues, toys that help couples have multiple orgasms, and toys to help men last longer. For men with erectile issues, we talk about soft-cock play, which takes the pressure off. There are so many things you can do.

How can people have hotter, steamier sex and keep the fire burning? 

Sex toys are so helpful. Self-pleasure is also key, because you can teach your partner what turns you on. Mutual masturbation is helpful and important so you can learn about each other. If you’re trying to keep the spark going but you lose your own spark, that will affect your sex life. Your awareness is important so when you feel better, you can bring the spark back. Stay curious about each other. Have intimacy dates weekly. It doesn’t have to be sex. No phones, no TV. Show up for each other.

We have chapters in the book about the top three erotic must-haves: removing goals, continued foreplay, and aftercare, which is an important time to stay connected.

What are your final words of advice for anyone who wants to go on their last first date?

Get curious, be mindful, stay present, listen, be attentive and care about your date. If you always treat them like it is the first date, that’s gold. Make a list of 100 things you want in a partner. You’re not looking for someone with all of those qualities, but you’re gaining clarity about what you’re looking for. That makes it easier to connect with the right partner.






Free Gift: Take control of your own sexual journey with Shameless Sex, a compass to guide you toward your most authentic and vibrant self! Preorder the book here: 

Watch this episode on YouTube

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If you’re feeling stuck in dating and relationships and would like to finally find love, sign up for a complimentary 45-minute love breakthrough session with Sandy

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Get a copy of Sandy’s books, Becoming a Woman of Value; How to Thrive in Life and Love and Choice Points in Dating; Empowering Women to Make Healthier Decisions in Love.


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