How to Date in the Age of Trump

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age of trump

My podcast guest, @JulieSpira, shares great tips for how to date in the age of Trump. This is crucial in our politically polarized climate.

My podcast guest, Julie Spira, spoke about our polarized political climate and how challenging it is to date in the age of Trump. She’s America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker, and has been coaching singles on finding love online for 25 years. She’s the author of the bestseller, “The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online,” and the upcoming release, “Love in the Age of Trump: How Politics is Polarizing Relationships.”

Listen to/download Episode 386: Julie Spira – How to Date in the Age of Trump

How to Date in the Age of Trump

What inspired you to become an online dating expert/coach 25 years ago?

It all started with a breakup. I was a technology executive, and the man who I thought was the love of my life was going in a different direction. I broke up with him, and I wanted to get clear on what I wanted. I said I’d replace him with an internet mate. It was in the days of dial-up internet @$2 a minute for chatting.

What happened was I was going on great dates with interesting people. My friends asked where I met these guys. I ended up writing their profiles, they met men on the dating sites, and I eventually gave up my day job!

How has our current political climate affected singles who are dating?

Politics is the number one deal breaker when it comes to dating. It used to be smoking. Now they say, “Smokers can quit, but Trump supporters have values I don’t agree with.” People are taking sides. It’s dividing friendships, family, and dating.

What should you do if your date gets political?

Align yourself with someone with similar values. If you prefer not talking about politics and they start asking who you voted for, or whether you voted at all, they may feel strongly that they only want to date someone who voted. Or if you’d rather not discuss politics, and someone brings up politics, the best way to respond is “I don’t talk politics on a first date. Maybe on the third.” Be flirty and playful and change the topic.

Should you post your political party on your dating profile?

I believe you should post your political party, especially if it’s important to you. People search based on so many things, one of which is your political party. You could post a photo of you in a march if that’s important to you.

When should you bring up politics on a date?

I’m a big believer in bringing it up on the first date if it’s your number one deal breaker. If not, bring up what’s important to you. Make five deal breakers. See where politics comes out on that list. You can say something like, have you watched the impeachment? What do you think? It shows you’re aware of what’s happening in the world.

Do you have any tips for dating your political opposite?

Ask questions. “Are you just a party person who will vote one way, or do you feel strongly about a particular issue?” This opens up a great conversation. You need to know what points we have of connection. The opposite of love is not hate, it’s fear. Many people are coming from a place of fear.

Can bipartisan couples get along in the age of Trump?

We wonder how bipartisan couples can get along. I believe you can get along, but you can’t bring politics into the bedroom. Switch the conversation to something you can agree on. Set a timer and change the topic.

This issue will not go away regardless of who is elected, so we have to figure out a way to have healthy relationships.

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