How to Find Lasting Love at 50 and Beyond!
My podcast guest, Treva Brandon Scharf, was a late blooming bride. She was finally able to find lasting love at 50. Listen to her inspirational story!
My podcast guest, Treva Brandon Scharf, is a writer, dating coach, and fitness professional who was able to finally find lasting love at 50. With over 35 years in the fitness industry and 50 years as a single woman, Treva helps people achieve peak performance in life and love.
As a first-time bride at 50, Treva writes about finding love later in life at her blog, The Late Blooming Bride. She’s also a dating advice contributor at Huffington Post, Hollywood Progressive, Midlife Boulevard, Curves Connect, and BetterAfter50.
She currently hosts the internet radio show, DONE BEING SINGLE on VoiceAmerica Network, with her husband, Robby Scharf.
Check out the show notes and highlights for episode #311: How to Find Love Later in Life with Treva Brandon Scharf.
How to Find Lasting Love At 50 And Beyond
Why did you remain single for 50 years?
It was partially me not being ready to settle down. I enjoyed being single. In my early forties, I had a delayed biological clock that went off, and the panic set in. I realized I forgot to get married and have a kid! The forties were brutal at times, as I was getting more and more desperate, which led me to make bad choices. As I was almost turning 50, I had given up hope. I wasn’t happy with my career. I had also tried to get pregnant on my own. I drained my savings and got into ‘fertility debt’.
It was the perfect storm of despair, but I didn’t like wallowing in self-pity. When I reached out for support, I was able to turn the corner, and the despair was replaced with acceptance.
I took control of my romantic life. At 50, I had a big party for myself. One of the guests was someone I met on Facebook. We had gone to the same high school and had a lot of mutual friends. We started dating, and we got engaged six months later!
What helped you finally find lasting love at 50?
I stopped being desperate and in constant pursuit. It freed me to enjoy myself and whatever came my way. It was a pleasure when I met Robbie, who was a very healthy man.
When you are okay on your own, it’s extremely attractive to a man.
After six months, Robby wanted me to move in with him, and I told him I needed a firm commitment at this stage in my life. I thought he was going to break up with me, but he proposed!
What advice would you give your younger self about how to find lasting love?
Have a clearer vision of your future; who you are and who you’d like to attract into your life.
As a child, I was left to figure out the world on my own, and I don’t think I realized my true value and worth until much later on. I wish I could have been quiet and focused on myself. I wish I could have visualized a roadmap, and recognized and acknowledged my greatness. I didn’t know how to self-reflect. I was untethered.
I wish I knew my potential early in life and a sense of my power in the world.
Listen to the entire episode to get more nuggets of wisdom from Treva on how to find lasting love at 50 and beyond!
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