How to Quickly Spot Red Flags in Dating

Posted by in dating a dangerous man, red flags in relationships | 0 comments

red flags in datingThis is a guest post by Cupid’s Cronies, a matchmaking website. (The opinions are those of the author. Last First Date doesn’t take responsibility for differing opinions).

Going out on a first date can be risky!  Let’s be honest, we’ve all had disastrous first dates that have sent us running.  The main reason it’s risky is that your date will probably be a stranger to you.  You are taking a calculated risk that could either pay off — you’ve met your future soul mate! Or it could blow up in your face if your date turns out to be very weird or even dangerous. That’s why it’s important to quickly spot red flags before, during, and after a date. It’s easier than you may think.

How to Quickly Spot Red Flags in Dating

1. Before a date

Although red flags are easy to spot while on a date, it is also important to start this process before your first date.  Before a date, it’s a good idea to do some research about your prospective date. Do you and he/she have some friends in common? Ask around casually and discreetly about what your prospective date is like in private or with his/her closest friends. You can even ask about their background, such as where they went to school, what neighborhoods they’ve lived in, and what kind of job they have. Hopefully there won’t be any horror stories, but if there are, you would do well to avoid contact with this person.  A side benefit of this kind of “data gathering” is that you can bring up some of what you’ve discovered during the actual date. This may be more challenging if you are dating online, so make sure you are using an online resource that has your safety in mind. At Cupid’s Cronies, we do background checks on those that use our services.

2. During a date

You can spot red flags by candidly checking out your date’s facial expression and body language. For example, if you’ve heard that your date used to work for the government but was discharged for some unknown reason, you could  casually say, “I heard that you used to work for the government. What was that experience like?” If your date seems to be hiding something from his/her past, questions like this can catch them off guard, and then you are free to read their body or facial expressions to gauge the truth. Stay calm, but keep that clue in mind in case he/she asks you out on future dates.

3. After the date

After the date, the behavior of your date will actually give you more clues that could be alarming. For example, your date might suddenly start sending multiple text messages that could leave you feeling harassed or maybe annoyed. If the texts continue without any apparent end, don’t reply. Keep those texts stored in your phone in case the situation turns dangerous because you might have to present these to the police as evidence.

No one likes going out on dates with strangers who have inexplicable behavior. By keeping yourself alert and attuned to what is going on before, during and after the date, you will be able to weed out the good dates from the bad ones. This leaves the door open for you to date only those people who meet your standards for normal or exemplary behavior.

Have some advice or stories of your own? Let us know below! Then, visit Cupid’s Cronies to learn more about how our matchmakers can help you find love.

 

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