Learn From Mr. Wrong and Claim Mr. Right

Posted by in breaking up with grace, dating a dangerous man, red flags in relationships, self-esteem in dating | 0 comments

mr wrongDo you keep attracting the wrong men? Daniella Blechner is an author, teacher, and speaker who is passionate about empowering women through the sharing of stories. After a decade of dating disasters, she decided to claim her story and use it to empower others. Her book, Mr. Wrong, is about uniting, inspiring and empowering others.

I had the pleasure of interviewing Ms. Blechner on Last First Date Radio.

I’ve loosely transcribed highlights of our interview so you can find out how to stop dating the wrong men and get yourself on a healthy path of self-discovery and the best relationships of your life! To listen to the episode, please click here.

Why do you think some women continually attract Mr. Wrong?

Many women think they’re looking for exciting men and miss the good guys.

I observed many of my friends who kept attracting the same sorts of men over and over. My decade of dating the wrong men brought me to self-exploration. I learned that what women who attract Mr. Wrong have in common is that they’re natural healers and nurturers. They like to take care of people, so they attract men who need nurturing [not emotionally healthy men]. Also, many had absent fathers and needed to heal in order to choose healthy partners. 

What advice would you give to women who continually attract or stay with Mr Wrong?

Take some time out. Forget dating. Get to know yourself. In my twenties I thought I knew myself. A few years ago, I realized I didn’t really know all my strengths and weaknesses. I’m still learning. As you’re getting to know yourself, your value and worth grow. Only then can you attract a healthy partner.

What role can forgiveness play in our relationships with others?

Forgiveness is the most powerful thing. It’s the key to letting go and allowing the good to come into your life. I had gone through an experience where I had migraines and back pain after a breakup. I felt like a victim. I kept constructing what I was going to say to him to get back at him. It wasn’t helping me. It was holding me back.

I eventually became conscious and aware during my day and stopped poisoning myself. I had been making myself ill. “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and hoping the other person will die.”

I started a forgiveness meditation. After about 11 months, the person I had broken up with rang and asked for forgiveness. By then, I had let it all go. I was okay. I didn’t need to be right and angry. [And I didn’t need his forgiveness to move on and validate myself.]

To listen to the episode, How to Stop Attracting Mr. Wrong, please click here.

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