Love & Work: start with a clear vision for success

Posted by in love after 40 | 0 comments

I am always working on several things at once. Call me a multi-tasker, I take all my roles seriously; a mom to two kids still at home and one married daughter, owner of my growing business as a dating coach, artist and art teacher, tutor, dater, daughter, sister and friend. I used to worry that people would judge me as jack of all trades, master of none. ‘They’ (whoever they are) might think that I am doing too much, thereby not doing anything well. But I have stopped worrying about what others think. Instead, I ask myself, “Am I doing too much? Do I need to focus my attention in one place over another?” And I shift my attention to the area that calls to me.

This busy and somewhat ‘all over the place’ life I lead is working out just right for me now. That’s because I have learned to prioritize what I want to focus on. I have learned to say no to the things that were draining me. No to the people who sucked the life out of me. No to over-promising or under-delivering.

I’ve noticed that as I learned the power of a strong and definitive ‘no’ to what doesn’t work for me anymore, I have also been able to say a clear ‘yes’ to what does.

That goes for how I’m growing my business and attracting my ideal clients. I am clear about which opportunities will serve my business and which will take me away from my goals.

It’s the same for my love life. The more clear I am about who I want to be with and where I want to end up, the better I’ll be able to recognize him when he shows up in my life.

It’s important to say ‘no’ to what’s not working and make room for what works.

How do you form your clear vision?

1. Spend some quiet time writing down the things that make your heart sing. Are you doing some of those things every day? I hope you’re doing work that raises you up and makes you feel like you are doing what you were meant to do on this planet.

2. A clear vision for your ideal match might start with a list of the types of people you’re most comfortable and/or inspired by. Are you dating men like that? Look for men whom you feel raise you up to be the best you can be.

Love and work have a lot of parallels. I’ll be exploring them further in future blogs.

Agree or disagree? I’d love to hear how love and work are similar or dissimilar in your life.


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