Mom, You Just Need to Get Laid!

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you need to get laid

After her divorce, Kate Somerset’s daughter said, “Mom, you just need to get laid!” So, she wrote a memoir about her dating adventures!

Kate Somerset is the author of “Mom…You Just Need to Get Laid: The Adventures of Dating After Divorce“. Written under a pen name, the book recounts the humorous and unexpected stories of Kate as she navigates her way through dating in New York City. A recent transplant from Texas to the Big Apple, Kate hasn’t had a date in 30 years when she lands in Manhattan. But she is determined to build community for herself in her new home and finds that dating is a perfect way to meet people and explore the City. 

In this episode of Last First Date Radio:

  • Why Kate wrote this book
  • The story behind the name of the book
  • Why she used a pseudonym
  • Favorite stories about the men she dated
  • The 10 lessons of the book, so you can #DateLikeKate

EP 494: Kate Somerset – Mom, You Just Need to Get Laid!

Why did you write this book?

I hadn’t witten the book had it not been for the encouragement of several girlfriends over mimosas. I had talked about my dates, and they said you have to write your story. 

What’s the story behind the name of your book, ‘Mom, You Just Need to Get Laid’?

After I was separated, my daughter and I were living together in Texas in the house she grew up in, and we went through a rough patch, getting on each other’s nerves. One night, she came home late with friends, and they took over my workspace in my kitchen. When I left the room, they took over my chair and my daughter wouldn’t budge. 

She said, “Mom you’re so fussy.” As she left, she said, “Mom, you just need to get laid!” 

I was so shocked! I couldn’t imagine dating or even intimacy. Fast forward, when I wrote the book, I realized the title was too good to pass up.

Ironically, you don’t mention getting laid in the book. Why is that?

Kate has a policy about not kissing and telling. It would have been a very different book if I focused on getting laid. I wanted readers to be entertained.

Why did you use a pseudonym instead of your real name?

I’m working on another book about leadership, and my idea at the time was not to have a book on dating when writing a book on leadership. I also wanted to protect the identity of the men I dated, and have freedom to write their stories. 

I believe everyone can be like Kate. Many women believe that when their long relationship is over, that’s it. Maybe they have fear, or inertia, and they think their romantic part of their lives is over. I don’t believe that. We get better as we go.

What does it mean to “DateLikeKate”?

  1. Be approachable.
  2. Be grateful and respectful of where people are coming from.
  3. Don’t prejudge a person before you know them.
  4. Take yourself less seriously.
  5. Embrace dating as an adventure.
  6. Don’t be afraid to reinvent yourself.
  7. Make authentic connections.
  8. Invest in genuine relationships.
  9. Approach dating with curiosity and hope.
  10. Get out there and date!

Share your favorite stories about the men you dated.

In the first chapter, my first date, when we had such a big buildup and in person, it didn’t work out. I asked him for an exit interview to find out what he liked and didn’t like. That was a great way to start dating.

Cupido the Conductor was someone I met online. He was a gusher, couldn’t wait to meet me. He lives in an Italian neighborhood in Long Island, and he took me to this tiny place called Lorenzo’s Place. I observed the restaurant like it was a movie scene. He showed me a metal house above the train station who let us in at midnight. He taught me how trains got switched. 

What do you hope readers take away from your dating adventures?

I wanted people to develop an attitude of optimism. I hope people recognize we’re never stationary where we are today. It’s a season of your life. Every challenge passes. There are seasons to dating, relationships, and everything else. You have choices!


Connect with Kate. Website: http://www.katesomerset.com, email Kate@KateSomerset.com. Get the book on Amazon.

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