Q & A Wednesday: Is it too soon to spend New Year’s together?

Posted by in love after 40 | 0 comments

Dear Sandy

I recently met a great guy. We have incredible chemistry, and we’re on the same wavelength about so many things. We’ve only been on a few dates, and he wants to spend New Year’s Eve with me. I’m not sure if that’s such a good idea. It feels like it’s too soon.

While I really like him, New Year’s seems ominous, a big night to spend with a serious boyfriend. Since we’re obviously not serious at this point (even though we like each other a lot), is this too soon?

Should I go out with him, or make other plans with friends for the big ball drop?


Dear Jeannie,

Congratulations! I think it’s fabulous that you met this great guy. It’s not every day that you meet someone with whom you have a real strong connection. My advice is to move slowly and steadily.

It’s easy to have an instant relationship when there’s strong chemistry, be it physical, mental, or both. Do you feel like you’ve been in the dating desert for so long, and you’ve finally found a spring of sparkling delicious water? You want to drink and drink and drink. But you can overdo it and burn out.

If you’ve ever experienced instant attraction, you’ve probably also experienced a big letdown and heartbreak. 

That’s why I would advise you against spending New Year’s together this year. It’s premature. New Year’s celebrations are for a couple who are dating seriously, not a couple who just met, no matter how great you think the potential is.

Go out and enjoy New Year’s with your family or some good friends.

If you’re still together with Mr. Fabulous next New Year’s, you won’t hesitate to spend it with each other. It’s going to be that clear.

Wishing you a happy, healthy, and loving New Year!





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