Reparenting and Inner Child Work for Healthier Relationships

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reparenting

Reparenting our inner child helps heal childhood wounds and leads to much healthier relationships. Listen to this episode to learn more.

Jenelle Annette is an inner work guide for women. She has founded multiple programs that help women overcome painful patterns & connect to their self worth. She has dedicated the past 5 years to crafting her methods and working alongside a wide variety of world class mentors and teachers. Her focuses are on shadow work, inner child healing, ancestral trauma, conscious relationship & authentic relating. She believes that everyone deserves to harness the power of self acceptance, as it is the necessary ingredient for limitless possibility and transformation.

In this episode of Last First Date Radio:

  • What is reparenting?
  • How we benefit from reparenting our inner child
  • What is ancestral trauma?
  • How we begin to heal our childhood wounds

EP 497: Jenelle Annette – Reparenting and Inner Child Work for Healthier Relationships

Tell us your story and why you do this work.

I’m 25, and I’ve been doing this work since I was 19. I was abusing substances, wearing tons of makeup, had bleached hair, and I was always trying to be someone I wasn’t. I always wanted to know more about life, but I had a lot of unhealthy coping mechanisms and numbing behaviors. I had gotten to such a low place, I had no choice but to turn my life around.

I moved backed to Vancouver without money or friends. I couldn’t stay stuck anymore. I started working with plant medicines and joined a woman’s circle. It was  a nurturing group of women who met weekly.

We did reparenting, shadow work, and inner child work there. It ignited a fire within me. Since then, I’ve found amazing teachers who have helped me.

What is ancestral trauma, and how does it play out in our lives?

It’s any painful pattern or behavior that plays out in our life that’s passed down for generations. For example, if your grandmother had explosive anger, it impacts your mother who’s either similar or the opposite, and that gets passed down to you.

Trauma can get passed down in our genes, too. Trauma elicits a defense mechanism. We get triggered and try to protect ourselves from the trauma with painful patterns.

What is reparenting, and how does it help us heal from our early childhood wounds?

In relationships, we often look for our needs to be met that weren’t met in childhood. We get drawn to a person that is similar to a difficult parent. We are drawn to someone else’s wounds and the needs we’re trying to get met. Ask yourself, what are some of the things I wanted as a child that I didn’t get. It could be physical or emotional needs. Also look at where did you get validation and where did that validation get taken away? 

When you were sad, and your parents didn’t have the ability to help you regulate your emotions, you might have shut down. 

Even if you’re aware of a dysfunctional pattern, we can’t avoid our attraction. Don’t try to force yourself into an opposite relationship. Work within the relationship to get to where you need for yourself. If you’re attracted to emotionally unavailable men, there’s often an unconscious pattern of YOU being emotionally unavailable. Open your heart more, speak your truth more. See what the dynamic is after you show up more. 

Reparenting is about assessing some of the missing needs from childhood, and then step in as your own inner parent and meet the needs of your inner child. If you needed to be validated in your sadness, you get to be the parent and practice self soothing when you’re sad. Check in and ask yourself how you’re feeling, so you’re more attuned to your emotions in a way that your parent couldn’t. Check in with our body, the emotion connected to the body sense, and then the need connected to that feeling. 

What are your final words of advice for anyone who wants to go on their last first date?

Go gentle and slow. Pick one thing to start with. Practice self-validation. 

Watch this episode on YouTube


Connect with Jenelle on Instagram @jenelleannette and find her free course in her Instagram bio: Healing Painful Beliefs

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