Self-Care is Crucial When You’re Looking for Love After 40

Posted by in dating after divorce, dating in midlife, love after 40, self-esteem in dating | 0 comments

self-careIn my last newsletter, I spoke about the importance of self-care, especially if you’re dating after 40. If you’re anything like me, you grew up with the belief that self-care is selfish. The message in my home was, “Care for others before caring for yourself”. While I’m an advocate for giving to others, if you don’t give to yourself first, you will often be running on empty. Everyone gets a piece of you except YOU.

When you’re dating, self-care is even more crucial. In caring for yourself, you are modeling how you want to be treated by your future romantic partner . If you put yourself at the bottom of your to-do list, you may as well be wearing as sign that says, “Treat me as an afterthought”. Take exquisite care of yourself and model what you want from your partner; to be cherished, loved, and prioritized.  Don’t you want to date someone who takes care of themselves, too?

I asked my newsletter readers to share 3 things they do to for self-care. I loved their responses. My readers are self-care superstars! Here’s what they had to say…

Self-Care When You’re Looking for Love After 40


I work long hours but take very good care of myself.

  1. I start my day with a smoothie that contains lots of blueberries and greens.  
  2. I get massages, peels and facials on a monthly basis that keep my skin looking young.
  3. I either hike or bike every weekend.
  4. I travel frequently. I’m leaving for 2 weeks at the end of September for the Grand Canyon and Sedona. I’m now planning my next big trip for a River Cruise to France next September. 

I thank the Universe every day for giving me a wonderful life!


  1. Veggie smoothie every morning. I use almond milk + a green veggie. It makes me feel healthy for the start of my day.
  2. Exercise. I either run in the park or go to gym for a couple of hours.  Sweating releases my stress and make me feel strong physically and mentally. 
  3. Makeup. I put on a little makeup before going out every day to feel pretty. 



To take care of myself I do the following:

  1. Bikram yoga 3 days a week (and I try to practice the 5 Tibetan Rites every morning).
  2. A facial once a month
  3. A pedicure or manicure once a month

A little pampering goes a LONG way 🙂 Thanks for the reminder!

Self-Care Superstars

Seems like many of you enjoy jumpstarting your day with healthy eating or drinking a smoothie. I just bought a Ninja blender and have been making smoothies with chia seeds, greek yogurt, almond or coconut milk, frozen pineapple, melon, strawberries.

An exercise routine is important, with the emphasis on routine. Notice the daily or weekly practice of yoga, biking, running, or hiking.

And I love how these ladies pamper themselves with massages, mani-pedis, facials, and makeup.

How do you practice self-care?

Please comment below and let me know what you do to practice self-care and why you think it’s important when you’re dating or in a relationship?


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