Shift Your Perspective to Find Hidden Beauty

Posted by in dating in midlife, self-esteem in dating, single women over 40 | 0 comments

shift your perspectiveIn 2009, I penned my first blog. It was called “Express Your Essence”, daily reflections of my life as a life coach and newly divorced single mom. The following post was written in September 2009, right after the Rosh Hashanah holiday. Although my belief in God and religion is often in flux as I try to make sense of my spiritual world, the overall sentiment of the article still rings true for me. I wanted to share it with you, and I’d love to hear your thoughts.

I spent the last two days in synagogue praying for a good year, one filled with an abundance of good health, prosperity, peace, wisdom, and well-being. Rosh Hashanah is a time for reflection. A time for repair. A time for the Jewish people to make peace with our fellow man, our inner selves, and our G-d.

We are called to conscience with the 100 blasts of the shofar, or rams horn. The root word for shofar is the same as my Hebrew name, Shifrah. It is a name whose sound I always found harsh, not really suitable for my personality. The hard f made me bristle. But I recently found out something about my name that changed my perspective.
The root word shefer means to beautify, repair and build. Just as a shofar’s job is to help repair, build and beautify us every year as we begin again with a clean slate, I feel it is my life purpose to repair, build, and beautify. Whether I am painting a battered and neglected piece of furniture and breathing new life into it, or working with a coaching client on building a better life, I love to bring out the inner gem that lies within each person I coach and object I paint.
Every day, I look for the hidden meaning in life’s challenges, work on repairing damaged relationships, treasuring life’s gifts. It’s not always so easy. There are many struggles. I sometimes lose my cool – my anger is something I need to manage better. The important thing is that I keep moving forward with hope, knowing that there is always another chance.

Shift your perspective to find hidden beauty

Over the Holiday weekend, I began to slowly repair the distance that was growing between myself and my youngest daughter. She stopped elbowing my head as I bent down to kiss her goodnight. She actually held my hand one night and fell asleep with her arm around me. I feel hopeful that this will be a positive week with better communication and peace.
So, it turns out that I was named Shifra for a very good reason. I actually can’t think of a better Hebrew name for me! Sometimes, if we give things enough time and shift our perspective, we can learn to appreciate what we once found offensive. I did it with my name, now I must learn to apply that same lesson to other aspects of my life.

Shift your perspective to find hidden beauty. What do you find offensive or difficult that could use a perspective shift? Your attitude towards online dating? How you feel about men? Please share your thoughts. 



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