Don’t you wish you always knew what to say when your feelings are hurt? It’s also important to know what NOT to say…
When my feeling are hurt, I know how to effectively communicate with grace and compassion. But, that wasn’t always the case. In the past, when I felt hurt or misunderstood, I’d have two basic modes of communication: shut down or get defensive. Neither is very effective. I had no idea how to express my hurt feelings without turning a man off.
I had the same issue in my non-romantic relationships. Whether it was a family member, a friend, or my boss who wrongly accusing me of something, I would be at a loss for the right words to say. I’d be flooded with emotion and just freeze.
I knew what I didn’t want to do—yell or slink away in silence. What I yearned for was to remain connected and empowered, feel heard, and be open for feedback. After studying communication skills for over a decade, I’ve finally learned how to effectively express hurt feelings, especially when to text and when to talk in person. I’ve also learned what NOT to say when my feelings are hurt.