Love at First Type: The Importance of Grammar in an Online Dating Profile

online dating profile

Does grammar really matter in an online dating profile? Check out this new study by Grammarly.

Grammarly, the team behind the popular writing app, partnered with eHarmony to determine whether the writing skills displayed in people’s online dating profiles affect their chances of finding romance. Grammarly summarized the results, along with other online dating statistics, in the infographic below.

The study

Grammarly reviewed 10,000 eHarmony male/female matches generated by eHarmony’s matching algorithm. Fifty percent of the matches advanced to two-way communication, while the other 50 percent failed to advance. Each male and female in a match wrote long-form answers to questions on their dating profile. These writing samples were analyzed by Grammarly’s automated proofreader for accuracy in grammar, spelling, and punctuation.

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What to Share on Your Online Dating Profile

Online Dating

You’ve decided to take the leap and give online dating a try. Congratulations! Online dating a great way to meet someone, especially if you’re over 40. It no longer carries the stigma it once did a decade ago. If you’re ready to start creating your profile, you may hit a few roadblocks. How much information is too much information to share?

Here are some tips to help you stay safe in the online dating world while still including enough specifics to show off your true personality.

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How to Write Effective Online Dating Messages

online dating messages

If you’ve ever experienced the frustration of online dating messages that go unanswered, I have a step-by-step script for you here.

One of the most frustrating aspects of online dating is writing messages that don’t get responses. Most don’t even get opened. When I first started dating online after my divorce, I would write long heartfelt messages to the men I liked. If I didn’t get a response, I’d take it personally. “Am I not pretty enough, young enough, sexy enough, don’t live close enough, etc. (fill in the blank with your insecurity of choice)?”

As a dating coach, I now know that when a man doesn’t respond, it’s not personal. There are so many reasons why messages don’t get responses. And if a person doesn’t answer you, it’s not rejection. How can you be rejected if you don’t know each other? While it’s not rejection and it’s not personal, you might be making a few online dating message mistakes without even realizing it. That’s why I’m going to show you how to write effective online dating messages that will get more responses.

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Are You Too Busy for a Relationship?

too busy for a relationshipHi Sandy,

I tend not to read most of the emails I get due to the sheer volume in my inbox. Last week I read your email about the ‘busy’ woman. It is then that I realized that my profile has the word busy in the first line of the profile. I’ve been on match this go round since Memorial Day weekend. They had a half price sale & I love a bargain. I was quite hesitant. The love of my life was supposed to be moving in by April 1 & around March 14 weekend, the relationship imploded. That was the last weekend I saw him. One & a half weeks later he stopped calling & no communication. It’s over. He vanished.

Needless to say I was heartbroken but I took advantage of the sale. I really wasn’t interested & the few men who messaged me that I might even possibly be interested in did not reply to my emails. Whatever. Like I said, I wasn’t interested.

Time passed & I read your email about ‘busy’ & thought…..I’m ready. I edited that first line & BAM! A dozen men started contacting me. I’ve been messaging, texting & talking to one in particular. We will meet this week.

So this is my thank you. I’m still having moments of sadness about the being abandoned but I now feel excited to be in communication & starting the next dating journey. 

This busy woman is ready.

Thank you!


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Should I Post Online Dating Profile Photos?

online dating profile photosDear Sandy,

I have a friend who has a lot of experience with online dating. She said that what she’s learned is that women need to approach men by writing to them first, and not just wait for whoever contacts us.  I think you’ve given the same advice, right?

She also told me about an attractive friend of hers who’s my age (49) who didn’t put her photos up online. She would contact men she was interested in and offer to send them photos individually. That way she avoided being bombarded by all the riffraff.  What do you think of that approach? Should I post online dating profile photos or just reserve them for the men I like?


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