The Surprising Benefits of a Break Up

A break up can feel devastating, but it’s a new beginning. My podcast guest, Tiffany Nguyen, ended her engagement to begin again. Listen in!
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Tiffany Nguyen‘s break up from her fiancé changed her life for the better. She’s a spiritual life coach who helps sensitive high-achievers reconnect with their truths and live authentically. She combines practicality and spiritual wisdom to guide people towards clarity and confidence in who they are, leading them to inner peace and happiness.
In this episode of Last First Date Radio:
- Tiffany’s journey to find inner peace
- Why a break up is a great opportunity for personal growth
- What Tiffany learned from leaving her fiancé
- 3 tips for anyone who’s considering breaking up
The Surprising Benefits of a Break Up
How did you start your own journey to find inner peace?
It was a slow journey to my awakening. I had a simple open conversation with a friend when I was in pharmacy school. I was engaged, and I seemed to have a bright life ahead of me. She commented on how great my relationship was. I honestly replied it wasn’t that great, even though I gave off the impression that he was the love of my life. I confessed to my friend that I was too good for my fiancé…and also not good enough. I wasn’t sure I wanted to keep this facade up. But, I thought I was a terrible human being.
I had immigrated to the United States at 16 and had been in a lot of toxic relationships because of my loneliness. My friend shared her own vulnerability openly with me. We told each other we both deserved happiness.
I realized I didn’t know anything about myself. I ended my engagement and started the journey to discover who I was. I felt relief. I was no longer lost.
Why is a break up a great opportunity for personal growth?
A breakup can be a big turning point. The growth and change begins when we realize that something is not right. We often consider leaving way before breaking up. Awareness of the problem makes the problem grow bigger. The breakup is a milestone, as it takes courage to take the final step.
A breakup is always painful, even if you initiated it. It forces us to be more raw and open with ourselves. We are faced with a choice of moving on and numbing yourself, or facing what happened in your relationship that you want to learn from so you don’t repeat the same issues.
What did you learn from breaking your engagement?
I learned that I let the relationship define who I was. I didn’t know what I wanted and what made me happy. I discovered my beliefs, needs, and wants. I suppressed my emotions to make him the center of my universe. The breakup forced me to acknowledge my greatest fear, loneliness. I thought someone would complete me. I had been afraid no one would want me. I faced the fears and looked at my strengths and weaknesses.
How did your fiance take it when you broke up with him?
He was upset and we had a big fight at first, but in the end, he was pretty gracious. I felt bad, but it was the first time I was honest with him. I wasn’t fully honest with my feelings, as it was the beginning of my journey.
What tips do you have for anyone who’s considering a breakup but needs some courage and support?
There are three qualities I encourage everyone to consider when starting their journey.
- Brutal honesty. If you’ve been in denial, get truthful with yourself. Not put the blame on the other person. What are you feeling? What do you want and need?
- Courage. You need courage to be honest with yourself and admit things are not working.
- Curiosity. Being curious about ourselves helps us learn about ourselves just as we would learn about someone on a date.
Get Tiffany’s Free guide: 7 Steps for How to move on when things don’t work out at https://spunkyspiritualist.com
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