Transforming How We Speak About and Experience Sex

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My podcast guest, Ian Ferguson is transforming how we speak about and experience sex. He is a Master Trainer of the Erotic Blueprint™ Methodology, and cofounder of Jaiya, Inc., a company dedicated to radically transforming how society discusses and experiences sex. His mission, along with over 100 Certified Erotic Blueprint Coaches™, is to release shame around sex, helping people empower themselves to reclaim the pleasure and true erotic expression that is their birthright.

In this episode of Last First Date Radio, you’ll hear:

  • What is an Erotic Blueprint, and why do we need to know
  • What are the 5 Erotic Blueprints, and what do they mean
  • What to do if you’re sexually ‘incompatible’ with your partner
  • How to connect deeply during the coronavirus pandemic of physical separation
  • And much more

Transforming How We Speak About and Experience Sex

What is an Erotic Blueprint? What are the different types of blueprints — and what do they mean? 

The blueprint is the expression of an erotic personality type. What turns you on and off. What are your shadows, how to have boundaries and declare consent.

The Five Erotic Blueprints (+1)

  1. Energetic: Turned on by anticipation and tease. Shadow side: so sensitive, they can shut down if the energy field is too fast. They can feel orgasm without being touched. Connect to the emotional quality of an energetic. 
  2. Sensual: Brings artistry to sex. Senses are fully turned on and alive. They can feel orgasmic when eating foods, smelling smells, walking into a beautiful environment. Shadow side: Can get caught up in their head. Nervousness about their own smell, or music is too loud. Can’t connect when that happens.
  3. Kinky: Filled with variety. Attracted to taboo, whatever is taboo for you. Could be intense dominance and submission. Physiological or sensation based (spanking, constriction) or psychological; control and surrender. Shadow side: Shame. Why does this turn me on? 
  4. Sexual: Turned on by naked imagery, bring fun to sex. Sex can feel like breath or water – they need it to relax and feel connected. Shadow side: So focused on orgasm and intercourse, they miss the connection with their lover. Sometimes they’re caught in an adolescent shame. 
  5. Shape shifter: All of the above, turned on by everything. They want it all. And they want more. Superpowers: have access to all turn ons, orgasms, and can be masterful lovers. Shadow side: Often left wanting. Have voracious appetite for sex.  
  6. Shadow shapeshifter: has all the shadows and none of the positives. Can’t connect with their bodies. Sensual mind is in constant chatter. Always trying to control. Have shame about their desires. 

Busting the incompatibility myth: How can couples with different Erotic Blueprints bridge the intimacy gap, deepen connection, increase passion, and create sexual satisfaction?

Incompatibility is not knowing how to speak each other’s language. If you’re committed and willing, you can learn to speak each other’s language. The energetic and sensual have trouble understanding each other. The first step is understanding your own blueprint. Learn your body so when you’re in relationship, you can say, “This is what turns me on.” Then you need to learn other blueprints so you can please each other. 

How can sex and pleasure serve our world during such unsettling times?

During this time of physical distancing, we can open to what is erotically possible. We can relate to each other without physical touch. Keep the flirtation going. It’s about cultivating your own arousal. It becomes a magnet. How do we expand sensually over video chat? Learn to play games, like the kinky blueprint. 

Foreplay pretty much starts at the end of the previous orgasm.”
—Esther Perel, psychotherapist

Connect with Ian

Erotic Breakthrough Quiz:



Instagram: @Missjaiya

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