Treva and Robby: Married After 50 For the First Time
Treva and Robby Scharf, hosts of the Done Being Single Podcast, married after 50 for the first time! Hear their inspirational story.
Treva and Robby Scharf married after 50 for the first time! They are co-hosts of the podcast, “Done Being Single,” on the VoiceAmerica Talk Radio Network. With a combined 107 years of single life under their belt, they have the wisdom and experience needed to navigate the dating world.
“Done Being Single” covers all aspects of being single and finding love later in life. From sex tips to dating intervention, from tough love to life advice, from personal growth to prenups, Treva and Robby aim to entertain and empower.
Check out highlights below for Episode 355: Older and Wiser – How to Find Love Later in Life with Treva and Robby Scharf.
Married After 50 For the First Time
Download/listen to this episode by clicking here or the player below.
How did you survive all those years being single?
Robby: Pretty well, actually. I didn’t have marriage as a goal ever. I liked experiencing different relationships. I had a few longer term relationships. I didn’t put much pressure on myself that I had to start a family. With Treva, the timing and chemistry was right. I was done being single.
Treva: I’m an only child, so I had the skills of being comfortable being alone. I was lucky in that I wasn’t in a huge hurry to get married until my early forties when the clock was ticking. I had a full life, and that helped.
It’s important to have options at all times. I had good friends, family, and great guy friends who were a source of comfort and support. Activities and hobbies also filled me up.
If you’re a single mom, focus on your kids and what you have, not what’s missing. Have a sense of purpose.
I knew Robby was for me when it felt effortless and didn’t come with a lot of angst and worry.
What’s the best dating advice you can give single people who want to get married after 50?
Treva: Dating isn’t so hard at this stage. There’s so much upside to being single after 50, to being okay with yourself.
Don’t keep saying it’s so hard and a struggle. It will eventually become that. Keep your life full with options, so if it doesn’t happen or it does, it’s okay. Spend as much time offline as online. Get off your phone. Look up. Meet people. Make eye contact and smile.
Learn how to apply the same focus to effort as you do to surrender. You are enough, but you’re not off the hook. Look and feel your best, and there’s a time and place to say ‘I’m good and will allow my life to unfold without forcing.’ Let go!
Robby: Date against your type. Your ‘type’ can focus you on superficiality (hair, clothes, etc.) instead of seeing the true person in front of you. Have coffee with them. You may be surprised.
What were some challenges to getting married after 50 for the first time?
Treva: You come to the relationship with set ways and habits. The ways in which we differ are the ways in which I can improve. A lot of times I have to put away my fitness and life coach background. I have to let him be him, and he allows me to be me. Be open to suggestions and change. Stand your ground and be flexible. It’s a labor of love.
Facing the hard truths is an opportunity for amazing growth.
Robby: I had different role models than Treva growing up. I came from a loving household. It was a strong family unit. Treva was an only child of divorced parents. A lot of [marriage] is not comfortable, but it’s part of the growth of our relationship.
Find Robby and Treva at http://www.donebeingsingle.com
Find Treva at TrevaBrandonscharf.com
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