Are You Using Food to Numb Emotions and Keep You From Love?

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If you’re an emotional eater, you’re using food to numb emotions. Food may be keeping you from love. Samantha Skelly helps you heal from within.

My radio guest, Samantha Skelly, is Canada’s leading emotional eating expert and the founder of Hungry For Happiness, a movement to support women around the world who are suffering from disordered eating and body image issues. She is an award winning, sought after international speaker who delivers inspirational presentations to empower those who struggle with the relationship they have to food and their bodies. Samantha has appeared on Global TV, Shaw, NBC and CBC to share her mission on an international platform.

Highlights below for episode #254: Using Food to Numb Emotions and Keep You From Love.


Are You Using Food to Numb Emotions

What inspired you to do the work you do?

I was a dancer and actress, and when I left the industry, I felt like I lost my significance. I substituted with food. I went on over 50 diets in four years. I was so disconnected from my body. 

It took me many years to begin using food for hunger only. It took three years of recovery to get to this place. My mission is to revolutionize the weight loss industry. Emotional weight is the driver in weight gain, not a magic pill or diet.


Why do we use food as a drug and numb emotions?

We live in a culture where we’re pain adverse. We don’t know how to deal with pain. When we’re young, we learn that pain needs to be fixed. We run to our mothers to ‘fix it’. Same with emotional pain. We feel the pain, and instead of moving through it, we try to numb it.

Pain is a divine teacher. It’s a catalyst for growth. The pain in our bodies is a message we need to address. 

How can we lean into the pain instead of using it to numb emotions?

1. Awareness. Acknowledge the pain. Be present and aware of it.

2. Acceptance. Be real with the pain and accept what’s going on.

3. Curiosity/Inquiry. Ask yourself, “What am I believing and thinking about this pain?” Our beliefs create our thought, our thoughts create our feelings, our feelings become our words, and our words become our actions. Our actions determine our lives. Discover where the belief that is causing this pain is coming from. Is it from an old paradigm? Is this belief true? 

How can someone who’s disconnected from their body reconnect?

Being in our bodies if we’ve been disconnected a long time—it can be a scary thing. Remember that our bodies are the safest place to be. Shifting our beliefs from ‘my body is the enemy’ to ‘my body is a safe space’ is incredibly powerful.

Use self-compassion and breath to slow down and become present, not numb emotions. It takes time to reconnect. Give your body time to rebuild trust. 

Why do we use weight as a barrier to intimacy?

Many women have had sexual trauma. It could be minimal or extreme. Women often feel shameful about their bodies, and they don’t want to recreate past trauma, so they use food as a barrier to intimacy. Many don’t date in order to stay safe.

They’re often not even aware of it. They need to heal the root emotional wound and reestablish the connection to their bodies. I use the ‘Phoenix Program’ to help them heal.

It’s freeing to heal the emotional wounds, to feel safer, more secure, and more intimate.

We have a program called The Society. Its launched twice a year, and the goal is to heal our relationship with food and heal our bodies from the inside out. This is for people who are committed to the process. I take them through the Phoenix Formula to bring them back to the essence of who they are, not the patterns that have been running them. It’s launching on May 25.

To apply to The Society and see if you’re a good fit, click here

To listen to the entire episode, click here.

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