[VIDEO] Can Attraction Grow?
The age old question – can attraction grow? In this video, you’ll discover what to do when the attraction isn’t strong at first.
Can attraction grow? You might have dated men where the ‘it’ factor wasn’t there. They were kind, smart, and good looking, but there were no butterflies. Do you continue dating men like this and hope attraction will grow? In this video, you’ll learn how attraction can grow and what’s necessary to make that happen.
Can Attraction Grow?
Most of us think we need instant chemistry
From the time we’re young, we’re fed the belief that romance is filled with butterflies and rainbows. He sees her from across the room, and there’s fairy dust and music playing in the background. They are immediately attracted. He rescues her on his white horse, and they live happily ever after. Yeah, that almost never happens in real life.
And if some version of that story does happen, it usually burns out quickly. That’s because it’s usually lust or anxiety giving you those butterflies. Maybe you felt lucky to be chosen by a man you liked, but you were uncertain about his feelings and the intense ups and downs in the relationship. Did that attraction feel like love? It might have, but that’s not love, and it’s not healthy.
If you’re used to ‘butterflies’ as a sign of attraction, it can feel boring to be with men who don’t turn you on immediately. That has to do with your attachment style.
For example, if you’ve had unhealthy attachments to men who are avoidant, the typical bad boy who keeps you guessing about how he feels about you, you will not easily be attracted to men who are secure.
The secures of the world can come off as boring. But they are often incredible partners and are far from boring once you get to know them. They’re just not what you’re used to.
How can attraction grow?
There are ways to grow your attraction with men who are kind, respectful, and available. If you can imagine kissing him some day, that’s a good sign. If he’s accountable and continues to show up as someone you can trust, someone you keep being curious about, give him more time.
When we care about someone, we create attachment to that person. And with attachment, attraction grows. Our brains create new neural pathways of connection and attraction. So, if there’s some attraction and you continue to be curious about a man, I recommend going on at least three dates. If you still don’t feel attraction getting stronger, he might be a nice guy, but not right for you.
Allowing your attraction to grow
Instead of always thinking there’s someone better out there, focus on Mr. Good Enough, the man you’re dating right now. Attraction can build through physical touch and emotional connection. And you might just forge the most loving relationship you’ve ever had.
Have you ever been in a relationship where attraction grew? Please share your experience below.
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