Why Successful Women Struggle in Love

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successful women

Why do so many successful women tend to struggle when it comes to love and romantic relationships? Dr. Sandy To discusses this on the podcast.

This episode is for any successful women who have struggled to find love. My podcast guest, Dr. Sandy To, is a sociologist with a PhD from the University of Cambridge who writes and speaks globally about women’s partner choices on TV, radio, podcasts, and seminars. She is the author of the acclaimed book, China’s Leftover Women: Late Marriage among Professional Women and its Consequences, and she has been featured in numerous media outlets such as the BBC, CNN, TIME, Financial Times, Telegraph, and South China Morning Post. 

In this episode of Last First Date Radio:

  • What are “leftover women”?
  • Why aren’t these women married?  
  • Do the women want to get married, or are they too focused on their careers?
  • Do high status women also want to find a high status man or do they rather “settle”? 

EP 615: Dr. Sandy To – Why Successful Women Struggle in Love

What are “leftover women”?

They are highly educated career women in China who are 27 and over who aren’t yet married. 

Why aren’t they married?  

They can’t find partners, because men are intimidated by their accomplishments and/or men want someone who’s inferior to them.

Do the women themselves want to get married, or are they too focused on their careers?

Most of these women want to get married. They want intimacy and companionship. They just can’t find the right partner.

Do high status women also want to find a high status man or do they rather “settle”? 

It depends on the women’s own economic values.

What are the four types of women who are seeking relationships?

  1. Satisfisers: They are happy to marry someone who isn’t the main breadwinner. They are more egalitarian.
  2. Maximizers: Want it all. Marriage with a man who’s as successful as they are. The problem is these men have strong patriarchal views.
  3. Innovators: They are more and more popular. They are willing to accept non-traditional relationship forms. They may not want marriage. They need egalitarian relationships more than anything.
  4. Traditionalist: They are the opposite of the innovators. They have clear marriage goals. They want a man who’s a chief earner and they don’t mind scaling back in their earnings to make the relationship work.

What are your final words of advice for anyone who wants to go on their last first date?

If you’re on the path to wanting intimacy, figure out what type you are and what you want, and then go for the relationship that you want. What are your economic views and what are your goals? Make sure you’re not resentful. Figure out your egalitarian views, too. Find what works for you.

Watch this episode on YouTube

Connect with Dr. Sandy To

Website: sandyto.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sandy-to-phd/ 

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@sandyto5293 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.sandytolau/

X: https://x.com/SandyTo3 


Please subscribe/rate and review the podcast here.

Apply to get FREE coaching on the podcast: https://bit.ly/LFDradiocoaching 

If you’re feeling stuck in dating and relationships and would like to finally find love, sign up for a complimentary 45-minute love breakthrough session with Sandy https://lastfirstdate.com/application

Join Your Last First Date on Facebook https://facebook.com/groups/yourlastfirstdate

Get a copy of Sandy’s books, Becoming a Woman of Value; How to Thrive in Life and Love and Choice Points in Dating; Empowering Women to Make Healthier Decisions in Love.

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